The Lair

I play a few games online. There is the notorious mind-crack that is Desktop TD and I also play on Battle.Net – the Blizzard Entertainment online servers.

I used to think that I’d grow out of this gaming business when I got older. I also thought I’d become more responsible, I’d have lots more money and that I’d know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. 0 out of 4. Well, not exactly 0, but fuzzy ideas and half formed plans do not a definite course of action promote. Oh and I also thought that I’d be more active (in a sporting sense) and inexplicably, that I might actually go back to wearing contact lenses or get lasik done. Nope, none of those have happened yet either. I also thought I’d be eating healthier food. Let’s not even go there.

So, clearly – this gaming business is here to stay for a while. In the old days, I could hop across to the US West or US East servers and be guaranteed a game. I play at weird hours anyway, so hopping to servers in earlier (or later) timezones is a surefire bet to get team mates who are relatively ok. And lest anyone think my standards are high, I mean team mates who are not drunk, not high on some other possibly illegal substance, not bored out of their minds and fewer “omg my mom is gonna kill me, I gotta go” incidents. And especially not team mates who are entertaining their girlfriends while attempting to play a computer game. Or even worse, their cat. Yes, all of those have happened.

With the advent of a nifty little program called WC3Banlist, there is more geographic location based discrimination on the servers nowadays. On a US server, but have an Euro IP? kicked. On a Euro server but have a Russian IP? kicked again. There is a sound principle behind this, of course – it’s unrealistic to expect some random Anzac dude to play well on an European server – but I happen to know that my connection is decent. Unfortunately, with the IP being what it is, I am embargoed in Europe, mostly. Which is ok. Europe isn’t the best server, but there are decent players.

But then, most of the games on European servers are hosted by people who don’t necessarily speak English. Umm. yeah. Problem.

Fortunately, Germans are common in the euro battle net server. Now, other languages I can’t handle – but the terse few phrases that are required to communicate with team mates in German? That, I can do. All except for one word. Occasionally, I’d have someone use the word nap as an adjective and I’d be all confused. Nap? He is nap? What does that mean? Obviously, rather than betray my n00bishness online (a no-no), I’d keep my trap shut and play anyway.

Today, I remembered the wonderful resource that is urban dictionary. Nap, defined. The third definition. Ooooh. Right. And here I was thinking that it stood for Notorious Ass Pirate. How embarassing.