The Lair

Back in the early 80s when television was in its infancy where I grew up, the entire family used to huddle around the box watching sitcoms like The Jeffersons and The Cosby Show. Yes, the stories in each episode had variations; but you somehow knew that the familial unit would win out. There would be drama, the occasional piece of angst but on the whole it was as predictable as soggy, milk soaked cereal in the morning (or back where I was: rice and curry for lunch). Wholesome drama that can be watched by the entire family.

Ostensibly, this is everything that Californication isn’t - after all, I’ve seen it referred to both as skanky and X-rated (they may both be accurate). The show has thus far featured nuns and other religious figures in inappropriate positions at least twice, there is plenty of simulated bumping and grinding, occasional nudity with the genitals artfully masked by furniture props and the odd cuss word (gasps of horror at the last, I know). You can just about smell the outrage, the burning of effigies/placards and the cries of depravity if this show ever dared screen in a slightly more conservative country. Even now, you wonder how the religious right in the US hasn’t taken aim at the show for its nun-too subtle intermingling of the church and blow job. Yes, I spent a whole 30 seconds coming up with that pun, so you’ll read it and you’ll groan. Just like I intended.

Yet, fundamentally, this show is not a great deal different from the aforementioned Jeffersons and Cosbys. It is about the constant strivings of Emo Duchovny and his writerly life. There is a superficial veneer of sex and salaciousness, of the wild life, of snorting lines of coke, of vomiting on paintings, of smoking pot. Whatever. Essentially, David Duchovny (Hank Moody, the stunningly imaginatively named main character) is portrayed as a nice guy. He loves his daughter. He’ll do anything, he’s desperate to get back with his ex-girlfriend who has left him for a (surprised?) richer guy with a palatial mansion. There are more plot twists, but the shining beacon that is Hank Moody’s goodness shines through. Somehow, you get the impression that you’re supposed to be rooting for Hank to get back together with his family again because you know, that rich guy doesn’t care about the admittedly tasty looking Natascha McElhone.

Do I like the show or not? I can’t decide yet, but I’m still watching it. I still believe. The truth about Hank is out there.

But really, this isn’t a review of some random TV show. For something completely different, four paragraphs later - I will tell you the point of this blog post. It is, ladies and gentlethings, to voice my amusement at the blatant product placement that goes on in Californication (and in a few other shows).

How about Hank Moody throwing what seemed to be a Dell notebook in disgust after it refused to boot (or in a burst of emo, I couldn’t tell) and walking into an Apple Store? He actually blogged from one of the machines in the Apple Store, apparently. Or the frequent, prominently displayed Apple logos on notebooks littered throughout the show. Oh please. Whatever happened to It’s a Unix system! I know this!. Apple has a history of being placed in television, according to this somewhat dated article.

You think that’s bad. Let’s take Heroes as another example. They actually wrote a brand/model of car into the script. Gone are the days when downloading torrents avoids advertising. These are the days of the infomercial (or should that be the entertisement? advertainment?). But the point is - we (and I include myself in this) will watch shows like this. We will continue to watch shows like this for the foreseeable future, because - like those insidious text advertisements, they are less annoying than what preceded them. It is now officially a trend.

The pity though, is that such advertising gimmicks aren’t going to replace existing 30 second spot advertisements. Instead, they will act as a supplement - an addon to the dweebs who still watch normal television and a way to snare people who use Tivos or MythTV or any other ad skipping device. It’s also considerably more difficult to legislate against such product placement in advertising, save in cases where there is a clear violation of existing rules (for example, brands of tobacco products or alcohol).

I always thought that Evolution (also starring David Duchovny. Coincidence?) was ahead of its time. Six or so years later, what was the ultimate twist in that film has now come to pass. So I will kick back on my [branded] sofa, kick off my [brand-name] sneakers, stretch out my arm and get a [popular] alcoholic tipple and watch what happens next on my [brand-name] widescreen plasma TV. Happy viewing, everyone.